Description: Originally written for an academic journal, "If you look at it long enough..." is primarily a personal account of Paul Hallam's recollections of "self-abuse" through the consumption of porn over several decades. With an introduction by Gary Wickham and fully illustrated by the artist Chagrin.
Brief description: Gary Wickham graduated with honors in philosophy from Miami University of Ohio in 1990. He subsequently received a Ph.D in philosophy from the State University of New York at Binghamton in 1997, and an M.S.W. from Hunter College in 1998. A Licensed Clinical Social Worker (LCSW-R), Gary has been living and working in New York City since then, most recently as the Director of an Office of Mental Health-licensed supportive housing program in Midtown Manhattan. He also donates time reviewing and cataloging archival material at the LGBT Community Center National History Archive.
Review Quotes: "Hallam's almost Proustian account of the role of pornography in stimulating personal and historical memory is an important and original perspective." - Jeffrey Escoffier, Author of American Homo: Community and Perversity; Editor of Sexual Revolution //------// "The essay is a frank and serious, but seriously witty, description of a lifetime as a consumer of (mainly gay) pornography. Although dispassionate, Hallam's narrative of "self-abuse", as he calls it, is not detached; and although, as viewer, he is physically and temporally detached from the actors he is watching, the experience is not lacking in passion. Nor is his account of it. He identifies and evaluates crucial aspects of the relationship between the pleasures of masturbation and broader aspects of his development as an artist and as an individual. Even if nostalgia is one of the motivating factors he names, the fact that he is both a film-maker and a writer makes this project much more than a mere indulgence in nostalgia for porn perdu. He is thinking about the ways in which we make mental visuals and narratives of intimacy to enhance our humanity. Perhaps intimacy is itself our most reassuring fetish." - Gregory Woods Author of Homintern: How Gay Culture Liberated the Modern World; A History of Gay Literature: The Male Tradition; and Articulate Flesh: Male Homo-Eroticism and Modern Poetry.